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{SFTH} *Mother's Day With EveryMom* 5/9/01
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MOTHER'S DAY WITH EVERYMOM
By Joseph Walker
I had just wrapped up my Mother's Day shopping last year and was
stretched out on the sofa napping my way through another Saturday
afternoon when she appeared.
Normally I'd be concerned if a strange woman materialized in my living
room. But I wasn't sure if I was dreaming, so I decided to go with it.
Besides, she seemed so . . . nice. Kindness was etched in every line on
her face, and her silver hair rested on her head like a crown. She was
trim and neatly dressed, with a manner that seemed dignified, yet
approachable.
Still, something told me she was troubled. Maybe it was the way she was
wringing that hankie, like she was choking the life out of some hideous
linen monster. At last our eyes met. Her sweet, sad smile was
wonderfully familiar. No wonder I wasn't afraid. She was my Mom! She
was your Mom, too! She was Everymom!
And yes, she did look an awful lot like Donna Reed.
"I was just thinking," she said. "About you. And Anita. Mostly
Anita."
She smiled at my stunned expression. "How do you know Anita?" I
wondered.
"I just know," she said. "And I know how hard this decision was for
her."
She had to be referring to Anita's decision to go back into the work
place after 20 years at the only career she ever wanted: homemaking. She
didn't like the idea of not being home with the kids. But the escalating
cost of living had finally forced her hand.
"I've also been thinking about me," Everymom continued. "And frankly,
I'm feeling guilty. Things were so much easier for me than it is for
young mothers today."
"You've got to be kidding," I countered. "You made it through two world
wars and the Great Depression without microwave ovens, disposable diapers
or Oprah."
"Cooking and washing aren't what make life difficult," she explained
patiently. "What Anita went through making her decision . . . now THAT'S
tough, because it cuts right to the heart. And what she's doing now
putting in a full day at the office before returning to a full night at
home . . . well, I never had to work that hard."
"I think I understand."
"No you don't," she said. "You're a man. You can't possibly understand
what it feels like for a woman who wants to be home with her children to
have to go out into the workplace to provide a better life for them.
Neither can I. Things were different when I was raising my children.
Roles were more clearly defined. It was simpler."
"Yes, I can see that," I said. "But simpler' isn't always better."
"That's true," she acknowledged. "It's good that women have so many
more options today. But that's also part of what makes it difficult.
With all of those options, many women just don't think homemaking is
enough anymore."
"Or maybe it's too much," I ventured. She looked at me suspiciously.
"Maybe women have seen mothers like you and they're intimidated," I
continued. "Many of them are single, or they work because they have to.
They put in a long day and then they come home and feel like they have to
be you: gourmet cook, spotless housekeeper, all-knowing problem-solver
and spiffy dresser. I mean, you've got to admit you're a tough act to
follow."
She considered the possibility. "Who could be intimidated by me?" she
wondered.
"Any woman who thinks you're what motherhood is all about, for one," I
offered. "Or whose husband remembers you. Or whose children watch a lot
of cable TV."
"Well then, we've got to let them know that times have changed, and
mothers have to adapt," she said. "The values of homemaking remain the
same, but for many homemakers the way of doing things has to be
different."
"You don't mean like on Roseanne,' do you?" I asked, horrified.
She chuckled. "Thankfully, things haven't changed that much," she said.
"But they have changed. And we need to let mothers know that as long as
they're doing the best they can do, nothing else matters. That's all any
of us can do just the best we can do."
"And what about fathers?" I wanted to know. "Hasn't their role changed,
too?"
"Sorry," Everymom said, smiling, "not my genre. Go ask Bill Cosby."
Joseph Walker
valuescom@juno.com
Send Joseph an email and let him know what you thought of his story!
*******
Joseph Walker has been writing professionally since 1980, when he left
college to join the staff of a daily metropolitan newspaper. For 10
years -- including six as the paper's TV columnist and critic -- he was
part of the mainstream media, and was painfully aware of the
overwhelming negativity of contemporary journalism. Joe says, "Nobody
was looking for real solutions to the problems society was facing; they
were just looking for someone or something to blame the problems on." So
in 1990 Joe began writing ValueSpeak, a weekly syndicated column that
attempts to look at contemporary issues from the perspective of
traditional values. Joe and his wife, Anita, are parents of five
children, and one grandchild.
You'll love his new book, "How Can you Mend a Broken Spleen!"
Ordering is simple and fast at the following Amazon address:
How To Mend A Broken Spleen
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/1573453005/qid=972961681/sr=1-6/straighfromthe0a
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Thought For The Day:
"Be honorable yourself if you wish to associate with honorable people."
Verse for the Day:
"A true friend is always loyal, and a brother is born to help in time of need."
--Proverbs 17:17
Kid's Thought For The Day:
An honest seven-year-old admitted calmly to her parents that Billy Brown
had kissed her after class. "How did that happen?" gasped her mother. "It
wasn't easy," admitted the young lady, "but three girls helped me catch
him."
Parent's Thought For The Day:
"Of all the joys of life, none other equals that of happy parenthood. Of all
the responsibilities with which we struggle, none other is so serious. To
rear children in an atmosphere of love, security, and faith is the most
rewarding of all challenges. The good result from such efforts becomes
life's most satisfying compensation." --Hinckley
Coach's Thought For The Day:
"Coaches that say things like 'I beat so and so, or I won the state
tournament' drive me nuts. Sorry Coach, the athletes are the
ones that have to perform, you just help prepare them to do it.
We're all in it together." --Bill Greer (Hall of Fame Member --Wisconsin Cross Country Coaches Association)
Deep Thought For The Day:
"Please do not complain about the coffee. You'll be old and weak someday, too!"
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REQUESTS:
To my friends on SFTH,
May 10th is almost here and that means I take mom to the doctor to find out her results on her Lab work. This is a very scary time for us. We find out if the spot on her pancreas has gotten larger. Please continue to pray that Thursday will be a day of rejoicing and that the spot will be the same size as it was when the doctors found it or better yet, it will be gone. I know we have a God that can heal and He may just have done that very thing. If not, then pray for the strength to accept the news and continue to strive on for the best. I know we have a loving God and we will continue to love Him through it all.
Thank you so much for your continued prayers. Mother's Day is Sunday and I feel bless to still have my precious mom with me. We are so very close and my life without her would be so very empty. You see, she makes my good times better and she comforts me during my bad times. She forgives me for my mistakes and never throws them up to me. She always has nice things to say to me when I think differently. We are always close by when we need each other. You see, this woman is not only my mom, she is my best friend. A friend I can tell anything to and she promises me she want tell it and she doesn't. I love my mom and want her around for many more years. Help me pray for a good report, Thursday, May 10th.
Thank you again for all your prayers and support. May God always bless and keep you in His loving care.
Sandra Fisher/ Eden, NC
scfisher@bellsouth.net
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Hi, I'm asking for everyone to pray for my daughter this week as she will be having major surgery to remove a malignant tumor in her shin bone. She is only 13 years old and has gone through 4 months of chemotherapy already. "Limb-sparing" surgery is the next step of her treatment plan. The surgeon will remove about half of her tibia and replace it with a donor bone held in place by metal plates and screws. Please pray for the complete removal of any cancer and a quick and full recovery. Also, pray for the Lord's peace and comfort as this is an incredibly scary thing for her. Thank you so much.
Donna
Dmdand3@aol.com
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_
/_/\/\ MICHAEL T. POWERS
\_\ / THUNDER27@aol.com
/_/ \ "For I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but
\_\/\ \ Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body I live for the Son
\_\/ of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me." Galatians 2:20
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